fate is a cruel young thing
by ARandomFangirler
Summary: the one where kaoru and kyoya have a deep discussion about haruhi on a beach, sometime after graduation. [drabble, introspective]


**me? being the only person to write kaoru/haruhi content? in this fandom? it's more likely than u think. also leave a review or ur moms a hoe lol**

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"Jealousy doesn't become you," Kyoya says, eyebrow arched above the rims of his glasses. Kaoru flushes pink, a colour that clashes horribly with his auburn hair, and averts his gaze.

"I'm not jealous," he mutters, a bald-faced lie and a terrible one at that. "I just worry."

"Don't we all," Kyoya remarks. If one were to look closely, they would see similar signs of disdain at this situation hidden deep in the depths of his eyes, betrayed, perhaps, by his death grip on his pristine smartphone. Haruhi likes to call it a comfort blanket behind his back, but she's not wrong. "Who knows what idiocy our king is dragging Haruhi into?"

The words are mocking, because nobody calls Tamaki the king anymore. It's a title he lost the day he graduated Ouran, and the Host Club was effectively dissolved for good; now, it is a term of endearment, for the most part. But there's a slight bite to Kyoya's words, one that shows his true thoughts about Tamaki and Haruhi as a couple. It is not the worst match in the world, yet nor is it the best, or even the second-best. Kyoya can quite honestly think of at least four men who would be better suited to bookish, modest Haruhi than Tamaki in all his...Suoh-ness. Except he cannot intervene, for that is a rule he himself drew up a long time ago, back when Haruhi and Hikaru went on that doomed date in Karuizawa. _No interfering with the love lives of the club_ , he'd written in swooping cursive, and maybe he's the only remaining member who remembers that, but he doesn't believe in breaking rules, especially not his own.

"It's not fair," Kaoru's voice cracks a little. Kyoya sometimes forgets that while Kaoru really is the kinder, more level-headed Hitachiin, he still shares the same violent passion as his brother. Blood is blood, he supposes. "It'd be easier, I think, if she felt nothing towards me at all."

On the beach, Haruhi stretches her long, pale legs. Built like a boy, Kyoya thinks wryly, although the Host Club never fell in love with her for her figure, especially not Kaoru. Kyoya does not pretend to understand his friend's pain. He does not carry the burden of a sibling, or the knowledge of Haruhi's true feelings. Yet he feels a strange cousin of it; not jealousy, perhaps, but distaste that of all of them, it was Tamaki who got his way once more. Kaoru is, dare he say it, a more worthy man. Not that he feels able to say this aloud.

"You will always have Hikaru," Kyoya says at last, and Kaoru laughs humorlessly. "At least you have that. I, on the other hand, will either die alone or married to a woman my father picked out for me."

"Don't fool yourself," Kaoru hums. "You've always been the most powerful of us all. If you wanted her hand, you would've gotten it."

That is not untrue. But Kyoya, for the most part, is an observer, not a participant. He finds it agreeable for Haruhi to hold his heart, so long as this gives him a free pass to scrutinise whatever he pleases. Kaoru turns away, eyes on the horizon, and Kyoya follows his glance.

"I'm sorry," Kyoya finds himself saying, voice uncharacteristically soft. "You're hardly the only one of us whose heart she's broken."

"I know," Kaoru says. "My brother and I, bound together even by our taste in women. The universe couldn't give one of us her heart, and so neither of us got it."

"You're an idiot if you think she doesn't care for you," Kyoya reminds, and Kaoru smiles softly.

"I know she cares," he whispers, almost inaudible. "I wish she didn't. I wish she'd let me go."

And they're a strange little group, aren't they? These overgrown schoolboys and their first love, bound together by fate and a debt. The scarlet thread of fate binds them all together, with Kaoru and Haruhi the most entwined. But fate can only get you so far, Kyoya thinks. Sometimes you have to do things on your own.

"Maybe she's waiting for you to let go first," Kyoya responds, his answer vague even to himself. "She's awfully stubborn you know."

"Maybe so," Kaoru says, and the sun sets, and he smiles.


End file.
